Caviar arrives with its own rules. It is served cold, it is served on its own, and it is never served with a silver spoon, because silver gives the eggs a faint taste of coins. So for a very long time people have eaten it from mother-of-pearl, horn, bone and gold.

What interests us is how quickly a rule turns into an object, and how rarely anyone asks whether the object could be more fun. The caviar spoon is inherited, a little too small and a little too serious.

So the question became: what if it wore jewellery? This essay is placeholder text, so the layout can be judged with real-feeling words in it.